The Top 10 Reasons I Bid Toddlerhood Farewell

My son Dutch is two and a half. Let me reiterate the “and a half” part. He has matured so much over the last half year. This summer has really opened up new opportunities for our family with him being just a little bit older, and I am so excited about it!

My husband Gary and I have decided that Dutch is our last baby. It does tear at me a little bit that his last layer of baby fat will soon melt away, and he’ll be saying his sister’s name “Ella” instead of “Ewa.” So I’m soaking up every moment of the here and now, but I’m also looking forward to what is to come.

I feel like our family is really hitting its stride with him getting a little older. We can finally do things all together without leaving Dutch at home with a babysitter or the other parent. And I absolutely love that. Because lets just face it, there are certain things that you just cannot do with an infant or toddler. It also frees me up a little bit to enjoy some time to myself. Ahhh…

So here is my footloose and fancy-free list of Top 10 Reasons I Bid Toddlerhood Farewell, in no particular order:

1. Our family can go to the movies together. I know this may seem like a little thing, but those of you who have one-year-olds will understand. This weekend I brought both kids to see Madagascar 3 at the theater by myself. Six months ago I would not have attempted this. A year ago, something crazy came over me and I did attempt it. And let me just say that it was not good. My 18-month-old had a meltdown and ran wild. This weekend, before we left to go to the theater, Ella even recalled the experience said, “Are you sure we shouldn’t leave Dutch at home? Remember what happened last time?” I explained to her that he is a little older now, and I had my game plan ready with fruit snacks in my purse in case of emergency. We skipped the previews and arrived right as the movie was beginning. So what was the verdict, you might be asking? Dutch did wonderful! He sat through the entire movie and was in no hurry to leave, still focused on the credits. And we didn’t even need the fruit snacks!

2. I can sit in a chair at the pool. I can’t tell you how liberating and relaxing this feels. We are members at a local pool club. Last summer, Dutch cried when I tried to put floaties on him. We struggled with that all summer. Most times I had to hold him or sit on the steps with him the entire time we were in the water. This summer he was eager to put on his floaties, and he’s learning to kick his legs and get around in the water by himself. I still get in the water and play, but I also have a few stretches of time, in between breaking up water fights and albeit they are short, where I can sit and work on my tan. :)

3. Our family can go fishing together. My husband Gary has a boat. I had been chomping at the bit this winter, ready to take Dutch out in it for the first time once warmer weather hit. Because I knew how much he would love it. He’s adopted his daddy’s love for the outdoors. I wouldn’t dare have tried last year, though. There’s no way he would have happily worn a life jacket a year ago. Since spring arrived, we’ve been out on the water twice, and he loved it, mostly playing with our fishing bait, the worms.

4. I can sleep in just a little bit later. I feel like the heavens should open up and a choir of angels should sing “Halleluiah” on this one. Now, I have to be at work five days a week at 8 a.m., and we have church on Sundays, so that really only leaves one day where I can take my time getting out of bed. So I cherish my Saturdays. (In my hay day, I could sleep in like you wouldn’t believe.) My kids are usually up by about 7:30, but now that Dutch is getting older, they have gotten into this habit of going into his room and having a good old time for at least another 30 minutes to an hour. So I get to catch a few more Z’s until they come begging for breakfast.

5. We can make it through church without having to leave. Now don’t quote me on this one, because two-year-olds are pretty unpredictable. So you could very well see me this coming Sunday making my way down the aisle with a screaming child. But it’s getting better. The times when I have to take my child out of the auditorium are becoming fewer and farther between. It used to be a constant struggle and shuffle to make it 45 minutes until the preacher said the magic words, “The children are now released to King’s Playground.” Last Sunday my husband Gary wasn’t able to make it to church, so I was there by myself with the two kids. I expected the worst, but am proud to say that they behaved like perfect angels. I didn’t have to get up once.

6. To watch my almost preschooler pray is heavenly. Dutch is definitely a talker. As he gets older, his vocabulary is growing leaps and bounds. So when we ask, “Who wants to pray?” at the dinner table, his immediate response is “Me!” And I have to say that it is the cutest thing I have ever seen. First he squints his eyes closed really tight and begins in a whisper that is almost inaudible. He says, “Tank you, God. Tank you, food. Tank you…” and then a resounding “Amen!” Sometimes he is even eating as he is praying. To hear him pray is entertaining to say the least, but it also reminds me of his budding awareness of and relationship with God. So I just eat it up. And to hear him say “I wuv you,” it’s divine.

7. I can leave the house without a suitcase full of stuff. This is big. It’ll be even bigger once Dutch is completely potty trained. I no longer need a huge diaper bag full of bottles, changes of clothes and the like. Most times I carry a small backpack with a change of clothes, some pull-ups and wipes. I don’t have to worry about packing sippy cups, because now he can drink out of a regular cup. Sometimes I just stuff an extra pull-up in my purse and go. It’s definitely getting a lot easier in that regard.

8. Our family can go bowling together. A couple of weeks ago our family was invited to a bowling birthday party. Our kids loved it. Ella had been a couple of times before, but it was Dutch’s first time. Of course, there were bumpers. And both kids especially loved the ramp made for kids to aim and roll the ball down. If you haven’t seen one, it’s really pretty cool. So bowling is now one more activity that each of our family members can equally enjoy together. I’m looking forward to adding bike riding to that list!

9. I can take a bath uninterrupted. Can I get an "Amen?" Now that Dutch is becoming more independent, he doesn’t have to be at my side 24-7. He used to stand by the tub and throw things in while I hurried to get out. Or he’d dig in the bathroom drawers, pulling out toothpaste, deodorant and lotion. It was a race to wash my hair before he could do too much damage. Now I can usually get him involved in some activity outside the bathroom while I sit and soak for a few.

10. My kids are really starting to play together. Ella is finally starting to see Dutch as somewhat of an equal, rather than just a baby. Now that he is more on her level, they have really begun to hit it off. It warms my heart to see their love for one another. Now don’t get me wrong; they still fight, and I don’t think she’ll ever be fond of him going in her room. But for them to have each other as built-in playmates is a really good thing. It gives mama a chance to finish cooking dinner.

I hope you enjoyed my Top 10 list! And if you are still in the baby/early toddler years or are expecting a baby, I hope you enjoy every minute of your life stage. This is just a snapshot of where I am in life and what you have to look forward to! - Erica

My Journey as a Mom—Part 1

Growing up I rarely babysat. Before I had kids, I had probably changed as many diapers as I had fingers to count. When someone handed me a baby, tension crept over me. I gagged at the face of spit-up, panicked at the sound of an infant crying in my care. And now, believe it or not, I am the proud mother of a five-year-old girl and a two-year-old boy. My journey as a mom has definitely brought me a long way.

My entire life I have never been a “baby” person, one that “oohs” and “ahs” over the infant stage. Even now, with two kids past the first year of life, thinking back on that time still makes me a little uneasy. Now don’t get me wrong—I did enjoy my children as babies, snuggling with those perfectly innocent beings with that sweet, new-baby fragrance. But I also remember the colicky evenings, the sleepless nights and the constant worry about whether I was doing things right. So I can safely say that I’m glad that little chapter in our lives is done and over with. I truly look at those who do love the infant stage with awe and wonder.

I think that I was hesitant to babysit as a teen because I realized early on that taking care of kids is a huge responsibility, one for which I was not ready. My theory was validated when I watched my teenage sister give birth to twins and proceed to raise them with the help of my parents. Kids are definitely a lot of work. I knew that one day I wanted kids of my own, just not anytime soon.

Newly married, I watched friends in my same stage of life begin having kids, and they playfully pressed me to do the same. But I just observed and took mental notes, on things I would do and not do when I had kids. And let me tell you, I’ve eaten my words on some things!

But at that time in my life, I had adopted this mindset: Making the decision to bring a life into this world is huge, one that many people make flippantly, it seems. I wanted to be as prepared as I possibly could be in every way—financially, emotionally and spiritually. To be a parent is to be largely responsible for another person’s soul. I wanted to create the best possible circumstances for my child to grow up and choose to follow God. I wanted a guarantee, that if I brought a child into this world, we would end up in heaven together some day. I still feel this way to a degree, but I realize that no amount of planning and preparation can make you a perfect parent or your child do exactly as you wish. I still mess up, and my kids still have free will.

But I do believe wholeheartedly in God’s promise from Proverbs: “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”

After about three years of marriage, my husband Gary and I finally came around to wanting to extend our family. We had been thinking and praying about it for quite some time. We had lived our “yuppie years” with two full incomes and little responsibility. We had paid off some debt, so I thought we were somewhat ready according to my checklist. I expected to get pregnant right away. My mom and sisters had with no problem, so I thought my experience would be the same.

Well, it didn’t happen right away. And before I expound, let me just say that our wait was minute compared to that of some couples. I can’t imagine going years without conceiving, and my heart truly goes out to those of you who have experienced this difficulty.

Here is the process we went through. It took us six months to conceive for the first time, and in each of those months when it didn’t happen my heart sunk in disappointment. I began to worry if something was wrong. Finally, I became pregnant, though, and I was ecstatic. We called friends and family to share our good news.

And then, just a couple of days after our announcement, I miscarried. I didn’t sink into depression, but my heart ached. I had ridden a roller coaster of emotions, and I mourned my loss. After that, I began to really long for a child. It seemed that everywhere I went someone new was getting pregnant—friends, relatives, celebrities on magazine covers. I was happy for my friends that experienced this blessing, but at the same time, my disappointment was magnified. Why couldn’t it happen for me, too? I struggled, trying to balance my deep desire for a child with my brain telling me to live with peace and contentment. During this period I prayed intensely and came across this verse in the Bible:

“From one man he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands. God did this so that they would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from any one of us.” Acts 17:26-27

He marked out our appointed times in history. Having a baby was not just about my plans. God is the ultimate planner—he knows what he is doing. I began to grasp this concept and trust that God’s timing was and is better than mine. Four months later, I became pregnant, taking on a restrained joy. I was excited, yet still nervous that I might miscarry again. But I progressed, and the baby growing inside me felt all the more precious because of the longing I had endured.

Now I am the mother of two kids, who elicit in me enormous amounts of joy, as well as enormous amounts of work. I think about my place on opposite ends of the spectrum of motherhood, fleeing from the idea of holding a baby to yearning for that very thing.

God has blessed me with the amazing, yet terrifying, task of being a mother. I still quiver at the seriousness of the responsibility laid before me—guiding another soul throughout life, teaching him and her what is right, and introducing and nurturing their young relationships with Jesus, our savior. I pray that I forever hold on to the magnitude of what is before me. But I also pray that I have joy in knowing that God is with me through it all and that children are resilient, even to my mistakes. They fall, and they get back up again. They cry, and seconds later they are laughing hysterically. God, please help me to live this time of my life to the full, teaching at teachable moments and getting caught up in all the pleasure and lightheartedness of childhood.

Erica

Chicken Fried Rice Recipe

In the mood for Asian cuisine? This is a great recipe for using up leftover chicken or rice! It’s a quick, easy and inexpensive meal, and my kids love it. In the words of my five-year-old Ella, “Mommy, this chicken fried rice is delicious!” The egg and green onions are what take it over the top, in my opinion.

I probably cook my chicken fried rice a little differently each time I make it. The following ingredient measurements are just estimates. You can give or take a little here and there to your liking and even add vegetables like peas, carrots or mushrooms. Here is the basic recipe I stick to, though. Hope you enjoy!

Ingredients:

6 cups cooked rice

1 cup chopped cooked chicken

1/8 cup chopped yellow onion

2 eggs

2 tbsp. chopped green onion

6 tbsp. butter

Salt and pepper to taste

Soy sauce to taste

Directions:

Sauté the yellow onion in approximately 2 tbsp. of butter in a wok or a large sauté pan. Once tender, add the eggs and turn continuously until cooked. Add the cooked rice, chicken and green onion. (You can add the rice and chicken cold from the refrigerator or heated.) Season with salt and pepper. Add soy sauce to taste and the rest of the butter. Toss well as the butter melts until everything is mixed and heated.

Project 365 - Part 2

So here is my second post in my venture called Project 365. To view my first post, click here. This second post captures moments in our life from May 15 - June 4.

Oh what fun you can have with a cardboard box!

First picks from our garden

Ella getting a medal at her school awards program

Laundry, laundry and more laundry!

Saturday night at Jim Bowie's

Painting my Canton and Ikea finds

Ella's fake nails that she bought with the money she earned for doing chores

Dutch Light Year

Ella wearing Dutch's ninja costume. She said it's her Star Wars costume.

Swimming and loving it!

Cousins, Preston and Ella

Ella in deep concentration at the Louisiana Arts & Science Museum

First day of camp!

 

Responsibility Chart

I’ve wanted to create a responsibility chart for my five-year-old daughter Ella for a while now. She has had responsibilities like cleaning her room since she was about three. But I think it is time to up the ante a little and put her responsibilities down on paper now that she is learning to read.

She inspired me to quit procrastinating and finally make the chart last night when she voluntarily loaded the dishwasher and hung up her own laundry. She even went on to color me a picture that she put in my lunch bag that I take to work. I think that she is ready for some responsibility; don’t you?

I’m sharing the chart I designed for you to print out and use with your kids. Simply click the link below to view and download the file.

Responsibility Chart

I’ll keep you posted on how it goes at our house. I plan on rewarding her for her efforts, but am still thinking on what her reward should be. Let me know if you have any ideas!

Erica